Hyper-Indepencence: A Blessing and A Curse of CVD

As I have mentioned in previous articles, mental health can be impacted by CVD in many ways and for a variety of reasons.

However, one of the ways it manifests is in hyper-independence. Being fiercely self-reliant and pushing forward despite roadblocks can be honorable. On the other hand, one must remember that a potential downside of this need for independence is potentially taking it too far to the detriment of the individual and those around them.

After a CVD diagnosis, many people experience depression. The article "Understanding Mental Health Challenges in Cardiovascular Care" by Pawel Brokowski and Natalia Borkowska discusses how "some patients with CVDs may experience depression, which arises from a sense of loss- loss of health, loss of independence, and loss of the ability to participate in previously enjoyed activities" (Borkowski and Borkowska, 2024). This makes sense as being diagnosed with CVD and experiencing an acute loss of security and safety, especially permanently, can be categorized as trauma.

In that situation, hyper-independence can be born from the hopeful but mildly delusional belief that if one just proves that they are capable, then they could be cured and perhaps even wake up from the nightmare of medically-induced uncertainty... when, in fact, it can only be the start of a self-imposed problem rather than its intended remedy.

People with medical trauma, including those with CVD, often develop hyper-independence. The article "Hyper-Independence and Trauma: What's the Connection?" describes how "independence is often seen as a desirable quality and a sign of maturity and success" (Charlie Health Editorial Team, 2023). However, for someone who is cardiovascular ill, this desired independence may be unattainable due to a congenital ailment or even be taken away from them with a simple diagnosis later in life. This can be infantilizing, especially when the only thing holding them back from achieving what others are easily capable of is physical capability, not mental capability.

Therefore, either to prove their worth to others or to maintain a sense of normalcy and self-worth, sometimes, people with CVD experience hyperindependence. This can manifest itself as reluctance to ask for help, difficulty delegating tasks, preference for working alone, fear of dependency, perfectionism, difficulty receiving compliments, isolation, social withdrawal, and overworking (Charlie Health Editorial Team, 2023). While this can be temporarily soothing and even validating, in the long run, it is a dangerous game that can end badly.

Personally, I experience hyperindependence and a need to prove myself and my health so often that it is basically a personality trait. However, that doesn't mean it's necessarily an ideal one. I can attribute my academic success to my attitude and hard-working effort; a large piece of it also comes from hyper-independence and the need to prove myself and my capabilities simply because people have told me I couldn't or shouldn't do things. But I needed to prove that not only I could do it, but that I could do it alone.

While I have been lucky, there have been several close calls for my health that very nearly ended in permanent disaster.

Hyperindepencence is a natural response to a CVD diagnosis. The need to prove one's independence to oneself and others is honorable and admirable, but it is a slippery slope.

Do so wisely, but it is okay to accept help even if you must admit that you need it.